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Differentiate Persons From Reasons


Differentiate Persons from Reasons

Less than half a decade ago at a major production company, not one of the IOC Big 5, here in Nigeria, Tobore a senior manager made life difficult and impossible for Ogaga in the department they worked in spite of all efforts made by Ogaga to get along with his boss aside being about the most talented performer in most of their projects. If there is any such thing as reverse kindred spirits, that's what Tobore and Ogaga are; they naturally don't like each other though Ogaga is very subservient. Because the frustration from his ultra difficult boss was beginning to threaten his health and mental well-being, Ogaga finally left the Organization to be on his own by which he started getting his grooves back big time. Barely a year later,  the same stone cold heartless boss was requested by some big investors to refer a consultant that will deliver a certain project action point, which was a jumbo paying opportunity. Guess what?  He dispassionately albeit anonymously referred them to Ogaga. Ogaga later found out and accepted the job against his wife and friends' pleas not to ever have anything to do with that wicked man again. After successful job completion,  Ogaga again made  his loved ones mad by professionally gifting  Tobore eight point something million as a token of appreciation. As I write,  they are still not friends and don't like each other one bit despite both being from the same ethnic group.  He referred his enemy for the job purely on technical ground because he had to refer someone who will deliver the job without jeopardizing his credibility.  Do you bring your personal issues into business and professional matters thereby unnecessarily hurting your career and others?  Do you hate or keep malaise with people to the point of being blinded on their usefulness and opportunity they present? Don't you think your enemies still hold some values you may need?

Business is business and personalities are separate entities; that's what Ogaga knew that his wife and friends don't.  You don't have to be friends with someone to work amicably with him or her.  No matter how we try or warm we become,  there are some people we can never be friends with.  Your boss, subordinate,  or even peer don't have to be your friend. Just let every body do what is to be done and move on. Nothing personal,  that's purely professional.  In fact, some kind of jobs are best done by colleagues who aren't friends. An expatriate used to head a department that worked very seamlessly and closely with the one I headed and we sometimes defended each other at management meetings with other rare departments but we are far from being friends and actually disagree a lot , something even our overall boss was aware of, but never did our personal differences affect our duties.  For the  same reason,  a marriage may be going through tough times and partners if matured and professional enough would not let their children know or ever create a public scene. Don't always wear your emotions on the sleeve. Emotions do more harms than we think or may know.

Many people don't know that despite the Intifada and terrible hatred between Israel and Palestine or between Iran and Saudi Arabia, they still cooperate in destroying their common enemies. When a dangerous terrorist is in Saudi Arabia or Palestine,  MOSSAD will inform them to quickly act or else it may be blamed on Israel if he strikes.  In the new world, relationship change but interest must be constant-K.  Nobody is worth dying for over an issue. Supporters may die in between them but warlords and politicians will make peace,  share spoils,  or work together when it's time to.  Never be fooled into foolish loyalty.  Be careful how you go between former friend else you may end up the grass they will trample upon. When it's not working,  it's not working. Sometimes the key to one's next level is with his worst enemy but they must work with the enemy for the sake of progress. We don't have to people friends to peacefully coexist. It takes maturity, respect for differences,  and an understanding of boundaries.
Good morning and have a great midweek enjoying working with everyone and getting the best out of people no matter what.

Christian Okwori 230818.2.012